A New Day

So finally today I feel as though a human still resides within this body. The last few weeks have been filled with a tired mind, body, and soul. So much so, that I haven't even logged on to check emails... Yikes I say!!!! Anyone who knows me, knows this is huge. The constipation issue, brought on; limited food for a week and a continous weakening overall.
The lightheadedness is an insignificant symptom compared too the numbness of my tongue and throat. I told Rodney yesterday, how ironic it would be if my voice was lost. The one who talks the most should lose the ability to speak.
It has been an incredibily hard couple of weeks. My children are at odds with themselves. They want me to get up and be better. Jordan is acting "crazier" in school. He has had such a stellar year, his teacher doesn't know what to do. Out of the blue, he walks into class like another kid. He grieves for me and doesn't know how to vent his feelings to let others understand. I am what you would call a translator.......
I do worry for him when i am no longer here. I hope I get enough things in order for him so he transitions decently.
Joce on the other hand is going to be lost....... She is soooo attached, I really do feel my heart break at the thought of not being here for her. She told me tonight "when I go to college, will you cry"? I said yes. True. Even if its from above. Not much tonight as I have been sitting too long and need to lay down.
More soon.
B & L
T